Look, we all have our quirks in the kitchen. Some people drink pickle juice, and some like salt on their fruit. But then there are the truly unhinged food crimes — I’m talking about putting mayo in places they’ve never been before. Recently, Redditor Dragonsrule18 asked the r/askredditfood community: “What food sin do you personally commit?” And after reading people’s confessions, I have to say…some of these are going to require serious penance.
So grab a snack (preferably a “normal” one) and prepare to witness some of the most chaotic food choices ever confessed to the internet.
1.
“Bananas and mayo. I just stick that thang right in the jar sometimes.”
4.
“I make carbonara with bacon, and I’m not even a little bit sorry. It’s a cheap, easy weeknight meal, and I do not source guanciale every time I want it.”
5.
“I still feel a level of shame to admit this, but I, a Black Southerner, eat my grits with sugar. I will be mailing my Black and Southerner cards to the appropriate authorities forthwith.”
6.
“Cut open an avocado, and pour maple syrup in the craters.”
7.
“I like pineapple on pizza. But I’d never order it at a pizza party. I’ll eat my fruity pizza alone and with quiet shame.”
8.
“I top my mac and cheese with a drizzle of my favorite soy sauce and then mix it up real good!”
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9.
“I like my scrambled eggs overcooked — not the glossy, soft, and still gooey ‘correct’ way. Foodies like to tell me I’m wrong, but I just don’t get why anyone cares.”
11.
“I am Sicilian American, and I use jarred garlic. I don’t always have the desire to break out a garlic press; I suck at chopping garlic super small anyway, and it’s sticky, so jarred garlic is a lot more convenient for every day to me.”
12.
“My wife put ice in her wine a few times on a hot summer day, and I turned up my nose. Then I tried it, and now I’m hooked on doing that, too. Nothing like a Chardonnay with two or three cubes of ice in it on a hot day.”
14.
“I put mayo on my chili dogs.”
15.
“I only eat the cookie part of the Oreo sandwich. I hate the filling. It’s too sweet.”
16.
“I get a bowl and mug when eating cereal. I dip cereal in the mug of milk, so I get the full experience without it being soggy.”
17.
“My mom hated mayo and dad loved ketchup, so we grew up eating tuna and ketchup on toast.”
19.
“Asparagus and eggs. The farts could kill a moose but got dang, it’s so good.”
20.
“I like putting sardines in my ramen — the Beach Cliff ones — with the Louisiana hot sauce.”
21.
“I like my meat well done, and I have absolutely no shame in shutting down medium rare lovers. Let me enjoy my shit in peace.”
22.
“I prefer beer at room temperature. The cheaper, the better. It absolutely kills my throat if it’s cold. I’m the same way with soda as well.”
24.
“My mom would drop hard-cooked eggs into the leftover pickle juice and let them sit for a few days. Delicious!!”
26.
“I don’t use salt when I cook. Sue me.”
29.
“I add cheese to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Sometimes I even turn them into grilled PB&J (and cheese) sandwiches.”
31.
“Spaghetti with (or even on) peanut butter bread. I don’t know how, but it was a thing when I was little. Haven’t had it in a long time, but I would, and I will. It’s delicious. Fight me.”
32.
“I put grape jelly on steak biscuits.”
33.
“If I run out of milk, I submerge my Oreos in orange juice. It’s actually awesome!”
37.
“I eat beef stew with buttered cinnamon raisin bread. I even put it ON the bread.”
38.
“I take apart every sandwich and then eat the ingredients a la carte.”
What food sin are you guilty of? Tell us in the comments or anonymously via this form.